Sometimes I feel, like I am drunk behind the wheel, the wheel of possibility...

So it has been a crazy week but a great one. I spent Tuesday and Wednesday preparing of for a big video shoot and then Thursday was the big day in Philly. Six bands and 17 hours later, we had a great shoot and the audio turned out great on Nick’s side. Then Friday and Saturday I worked out at the University of Delaware football game opening night. We broadcasted to TV and it was another long 2 days. Then this morning I played piano for the Presbyterian Church in town and helped with the youth group in the evening.

Being at the football game took me way back to high school, standing underneath the bleachers with my friends talking and having a good time just wasting time when none of us actually really liked football. We’d just stand there sharing our aspirations for the future. Man how time flies… I was moving some speakers around and some Jr. High guys stopped me and asked me if I was working audio at the game and I said I was. They were so interested in all that I was doing and we had a good conversation about the acoustical aspects of the stadium…surprisingly these guys knew a good amount of information about sound already. These guys were so in awe that this was my job and they said that someday they’d like to be in my shoes. That was a weird feeling…someone was actually looking up to me…it was kind of scary at the same time…it was very flattering, it’s just that I never saw myself as the kind of person someone would aspire to be…makes me kind of appreciate my occupation more and more…

My friends Dan, Josiah, Jared and recently, South’s band Augustana finally released their debut album and it sounds incredible… “Mayfield” still moves me everytime…be sure and pick up their album… “All the Stars and Boulevards”

I talked to my friend Tara V on the phone today, and without disclosing important info, the music industry is just not right. There’s a lot of politics, that’s the one thing in the music industry I have a hard time swallowing. I think the indie market is back on the rise.

I was also reflecting on my last year at college and talking with some friends I really wronged those last couple semesters. I spent all of my time being loyal to Josh’s music and ignored my other commitments. Now I feel as though I’ve ruined relationships the truly great musicians with great hearts. Although I could easily blame Josh for all of this, I can’t really point fingers because in the end it was my decision. He is deceitful and manipulative, but I can’t change someone’s character, just my decisions to not let that affect me and the people around me. It’s a lesson, learned…a difficult one, but a lesson never the less…I was talking to T later about how bad I felt and he suggested that if I felt like I should apologize then I should do it right away…so I picked up my phone and called everyone I could think of immediately. I know not everyone will forgive me, but I want to salvage what I can…

In reading all my old journal entries to look for people I should call, I saw so many thing from last year that I wanted to do and never did or even the things I did that I didn’t really want to. Last year this time, I said I’d never get caught up in other people’s music again and concentrate on my own. That definitely didn’t happen. I can’t let it go this time, I have to stand firm and clean house. I have to tie up loose ends, and finish what I’ve started before starting over. All those websites I’ve procrastinated finishing and promises I never got around too, they finish now.

Anyway, it’s late and I have to work in the morning, so I’ll write more later.
-Rod