I Will Cling To The Old Rugged Cross And Exchange It One Day For A Crown...

I can't even remember when the last time I posted was, but here I am again...

I've been a bit frustrated lately, because I feel like I'm on a kind of writer's block...that is, not just writing songs, but "in the studio" as well. I can't get my music to sound right. Sometimes I fear that being away from such a rich musical community like Greenville has not allowed me to recharge my musical being. We'll see...maybe it's just a phase.

Other than that, I went to church this last Sunday. I was kind of scared because the church I was visiting is close, but it's kind of a TV-Church, there's 4,000 members. Surprisingly, even though the service was a bit long for me (nearly 2.5 hours!) I didn't even notice. The music was incredible and although I was a bit cynical of the preacher, she had a message that was right on the point, everything was true. I left feeling good, I think I'll go again and gradually rebuild my faith in the church.

Nick and I went to go see "United93" on Friday and it was a tear-jerker...I did almost get sick three times, but not because of emotions, the whole movie was from a handheld camera and was shaking around so much I was getting dizzy. It was weird, because I never get motion sickness. Aside from that, I remembered that whatever problems I may have in life, someone is dealing with situations much more difficult. I do suggest it to anyone that can see it.

The weird thing is, that I went to a link online and watched an indie documentary called "Loose Change 911". Granted I don't believe everything at face value, but it had some interesting content. Check it out if you have the chance. If even half of what this claims is true, then mankind has reached a new low on the largest scale. It's hard for me to swallow, and I really debated it through the day, but I came to the conclusion that I don't know enough about anything to judge. At the same time, whatever I think of won't change what actually is.

All this to say that one night I sat in my living room playing my guitar and singing praise songs and hymns. I was kind of bummed at the state of the world even if the documentary wasn't true...I started singing "The Old Rugged Cross" and I was kind of choking up anyway, but I got to the line, "I will cling to the old rugged cross and exchange it one day for a crown..." I lost it. I don't know why it hit me, but it was like the hope that someday, through all of the craziness and complications and world's selfishness, things will be okay. Even if you're not religious, the idea of bearing a cross is universal. Everyone bears a cross day-to-day...and the idea that someday we can not only lay down that cross, but exchange it for a symbol of royalty is amazing. So today, I will embrace my hardships with my blessings and put it down for a very undeserved, but very appreciated crown.

So, now I think I'm going to run down to Wawa and grab a late night hotdog and head to bed...

"I will cling to the old rugged cross, and exchange it one day for a crown..."

Goodnight...